Dare to Forgive
FORGIVENESS from “I Am the Word,” by Paul Selig
“What does man do when man believes himself not to have been forgiven by himself, or by his Creator, or by his fellow man? What is the process of forgiveness? Is one really required to forgive his enemies in order to ascend in consciousness?
“We will tell you this: It’s actually not possible to ascend in consciousness to the extent that you require your brother to suffer.
“The natural state of man is to be in forgiveness and the recognition of the divinity of his brother. That is actually the true state of who you are and how you are intended to negotiate with one another and behave with one another and experience one another. It’s as if the dance was always in place and everybody could step on one another’s foot as part of the dance and not be smacked for it. And somewhere along the road, man began to hold grudges and to covet and to fear and consequently began to hold their brothers outside of the light while claiming that they could be in the light. And isn’t that an impossibility, to stand in the light while you demand your brother stand in the darkness?
“Many of you have great rage at what you believe God to be, because he has taken things from you, or you believe he has, when in fact, of course, God does not take, God gives. God is the benefactor and creation has its cycles of life and death and transformation. So blaming God never gets you anywhere except angry. It blocks you from the flow of your own Divine Self.
{AFFIRM:}“At this moment in time, I am choosing to forgive myself for any and all trespasses I may have incurred against myself and my fellow man and my creator, I am willing to be forgiven for any and all beliefs that I have held that have stopped me from experiencing myself as forgiveness by my Creator, I am not allowing myself to believe that I can be, and that I am, and that I am being forgiven for anything and everything that I may have done, that I may have imagined, that I may have thought, that I may have experienced that I may have chosen or that I may have been gifted with that has given me reason to not forgive myself, my creator and my fellows. I am now free of unforgiveness and I stand firm in my knowing that I am worthy of the Creator and that I am worthy of my fellow man, and I am worthy of the journey I intend to go in.
“We are saying that unforgiveness locks you in and it locks the relationship into a dynamic that actually does not move. The relationship cannot transform when unforgiveness is in play.
“The willingness to forgive this person or this situation is present within me.”
“Let this alignment come to pass. You have to encourage it only by deciding that you are not going to continue to withhold forgiveness against your fellows, or the situation, or the self or the Creator. That much is in your hands to make so.”
Forgiveness Sets You Free
Forgiveness has changed my life. I have worked mindfully for years to bring up names of people and situations I have held anger, judgment and separation with/from. Originally I had convinced myself that not forgiving meant they couldn’t hurt me again and I’d remind them they couldn’t do that to me. I told myself it was for the better, it was out of self protection and was self–caring. But the truth is it was sucking the life out of me. I carried each person and each situation around like an energetic garbage bag slung heavily over my shoulder through each step in my life.
All the reasons I held onto grudges worked against me. Grudges did not protect me, they burdened me. They did not separate me away from anyone harmful they kept me married to them through my hatred. It didn’t allow me to completely love myself because I was busy destroying others with my thoughts and emotions. Bitterness is a bitter pill I swallowed over and over again and then blamed others for making me swallow. Unforgiveness did not end the terrible hurt I was feeling, it kept the hurt cemented and carried the hurt into each day, month and year.
The process I undertook was to view each name and each situation with the intent to be healed. I looked at each situation, one at a time, from several perspectives. I already was familiar with my angry perspective, so this time I looked at what their perspective possibly was, and at several other perspectives I could think of. I also looked through their eyes at me to see what I did to create my part in the issue. And after much remorse, often tears, and sometimes surprise at what I learned about myself and others, I then took responsibility. I let go, I forgave. And to be clear, in a situation where I was not responsible (for instance with my parents when I was a child, etc.) I then looked at what I was doing today with my anger and my hurt and how I was mistreating others through the veil of resentment. As they say ~ unforgiveness is like drinking poison and hoping someone else will die.
I can tell you that once the forgiveness process was done I felt an amazing freedom. Besides freedom, I gained back attention, self-care, presence, and joy. No one had control over me any longer. The hurt was gone and new happiness and self-respect in its place.
Forgiveness is a huge subject. It affects our world. Our world has war and strife going on now over misunderstandings, over one people believing that their way of doing things is right, over fear or control over others, and being peeved at the way another country chooses to do things we do not agree with. On a global level we are bombarded by a lack of forgiveness and a lack of understanding and compassion.
"Every decision you make - every decision - is not a decision about what to do. It's a decision about Who You Are. When you see this, when you understand it, everything changes. You begin to see life in a new way. All events, occurrences, and situations turn into opportunities to do what you came here to do."
Neale Donald Walsch
Author of Conversations With God
Author of Conversations With God
Taking that experience to a personal level – what is happening globally with unforgiveness is mirrored by us wherever and whenever we do not forgive ourselves and others.
Forgiving takes work; however the payoff goes to each of us directly. Forgiveness is a great service to the planet and everyone we interact with.
“To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you. “ ~Lewis B. Smedes,
“Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future.” ~Paul Boese
The American Heritage College Dictionary defines "forgive" as, "To renounce anger or resentment against." It goes back to a Greek root word that means "to set free," as in freeing a slave. Ironically, when we forgive, the slave we free is ourselves. We free ourselves from being slaves to our own hatred.
“The best definition of forgiveness I ever heard is giving up the hope that the past could be any different. I love that definition, because it doesn’t mean that you then have to accept the person back into your life. Forgiveness does not mean I now want to have you over for dinner. It doesn’t mean I want to associate with you. It just means I will no longer be tied to the past.”
-Oprah Winfrey
-Oprah Winfrey
Which means you can mourn until you’re dry, and then you can choose to move on.
Give yourself the best gift this season, the gift of a clean slate, of freedom, or releasing yourself, everyone and everything from the bondage of a grudge. Forgive, let go, move on. It will allow you to be here now, and being here now is truly a dream come true.
